"Trust in the LORD with all your heart. Lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6
January is a very reflective sort of month. It begins with New Year's resolutions. Tries for two weeks, then pauses with a day to remember a bold Jesus-lover who fought for lasting change in our nation. January picks back up with a push... only to be often paused with a snow day or two. Then (at least in my life) it ends with a single weekday vacation to celebrate the change of semesters.
And so, in this reflective mood, I offer an extended metaphor of trust.
You see, I've had an on-going argument with our Loving Father for the last twenty-five years over this concept of trust. Last year, I shared the picture of glissading. Now, in His perfect irony, I'm the one who campaigns to bring an ice axe on snowshoeing adventures... "Just in case!" In previous years, the word "trust" occupied an important role as the frequent Sharpie tattoo in bold block letters across my left hand. As I transitioned to a professional role as a teacher, the font became smaller and the ink less permanent. I like to think the message of the reminder is tattooed upon my heart now.
But, that's giving myself too much credit!
Instead, let's consider the example of surfing. Last Memorial Day, the young man I was dating convinced me to go surfing with him and his family. In May it is still very cold, even if you drive to Oregon, which we did. My bones are very dense, so I sink in situations where normal people float. This makes surfing (or any ocean sport, for that matter) terrifying.
As Ben explained it, "you just have to find your balance, then the wave will do all the work." As Ben explained, I became very frustrated. I am not a balance sort of person. I am an all-in all-the-time sort of person. So, I drank a lot of the ocean. And I became very mad at Ben. Consequently, I never was able to stand up on my surf board and did not find surfing "fun". However, in order to maintain my relationship with Ben (for the next two weeks) I worked very hard to pretend that I had found surfing fun.
Until recently, I thought that surfing was a very good example of trusting God. Learning to find balance and letting the wave do the work. I would pretend to enjoy trusting to maintain my relationship with God, just as I had pretended to enjoy surfing.
Then I realized how dumb that metaphor was.
Pretending to enjoy surfing did not preserve my relationship with Ben. It may have prolonged it, but did not contribute positively. I almost learned nothing from the whole surfing experience. And if I were to try surfing again, there is still a very real possibility that I could drown. I appreciate the lessons that do not end in death.
Trusting is not about finding balance. Trusting is about finding Jesus. Trust is not the wave that pushes us towards the shore. Rather, trust is the ocean. Trust is the air. Trust is the sand that gets stuck in your wetsuit. (Remember, I was learning to surf in Oregon...)
Therefore, I continue to seek my Savior in the lonely places. A snowed-in house in the ghetto. A national park on a beautiful Sunday afternoon. An empty classroom at the end of a long, long day. I don't fight the tide and my God-given inhibitions.
Trust is simpler than fighting to catch the perfect wave on a floating piece of fiberglass. Instead, it reminds me of driving to a family gathering with the people you love most. Trusting my mom in her big red Forester to get us to Christmas alive and on time. Trusting my friend to navigate us safely off a snowy mountain. Trusting my youth team to decide that students should spend a night with their families (and off the roads!)
While I'm not sure if my surfing days are over, I need to be done fighting for control. The Creator who designed the ocean has a plan for my life. It's a lot more like a kick-boxing move than a yoga pose. And it does not resemble surfing at all.
Acknowledging Him, my path is very straight. I am a citizen of Heaven, walking on Earth. My path leads to Him. Life is unexpected, even more erratic than the waves. But my purpose is very clear. Trusting God brings Him glory. Isn't that why we're here after all?
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
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Ephesians 5
Therefore, be imitators of God as dearly loved children and live in love, just as Christ also loved us and gave himself for us, a sacrificial and fragrant offering to God. But among you there must not be either sexual immorality, impurity of any kind, or greed, as these are not fitting for the saints. Neither should there be vulgar speech, foolish talk, or coarse jesting – all of which are out of character – but rather thanksgiving. For you can be confident of this one thing: that no person who is immoral, impure, or greedy (such a person is an idolater) has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God.
Let nobody deceive you with empty words, for because of these things God’s wrath comes on the sons of disobedience. Therefore do not be partakers with them, for you were at one time darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of the light – for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness, and truth – and find out what pleases the Lord. Do not participate in the unfruitful deeds of darkness, but rather expose them. For the things they do in secret are shameful even to mention. But all things being exposed by the light are made evident. For everything made evident is light, and for this reason it says:
“Awake, O sleeper!
Rise from the dead,
and Christ will shine on you!”
Therefore be very careful how you live – not as unwise but as wise, taking advantage of every opportunity, because the days are evil. For this reason do not be foolish, but be wise by understanding what the Lord’s will is. And do not get drunk with wine, which is debauchery, but be filled by the Spirit, speaking to one another in psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing and making music in your hearts to the Lord, always giving thanks to God the Father for each other in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, and submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord, because the husband is the head of the wife as also Christ is the head of the church – he himself being the savior of the body. But as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for her to sanctify her by cleansing her with the washing of the water by the word, so that he may present the church to himself as glorious – not having a stain or wrinkle, or any such blemish, but holy and blameless. In the same way husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one has ever hated his own body but he feeds it and takes care of it, just as Christ also does the church, for we are members of his body. For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and will be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. This mystery is great – but I am actually speaking with reference to Christ and the church. Nevertheless, each one of you must also love his own wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
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