a half-day away

Spring break is coming! And then, I will blog.

And rest.

And get in shape for track season.

And read my Bible.

And read other books.

And practice French.

And mail the visa application sitting in my car.

And sleep until I am not tired anymore.

And make my garden beautiful.

And have time to be a real youth pastor.

And go to many classes at the Y.

And rest.

flowers, reading, and rebels

God fixed the weather this weekend. Even Friday was sunny, perfect for a day off! So, with the National Boards portfolio successfully delivered to the FedEx office...

Today was a day for the garden! The front bed is now home to violas, primroses, and hopeful spring bulbs. The back yard has a new rhododendron and a patch of strawberries and rhubarb. Crisp season, anyone? Now, to wait and see if any of the bulbs will have time to grow and blossom before I move out in June!

By 1:00, the sun was tired. That was my cue to head inside and read the first book I've read since beginning the National Boards process. I read Little Princes by Connor Grennan today, about reuniting trafficked children in Nepal with their families. I love stories where people meet Jesus while responding to suffering. The Gospel really is beautiful.

Then, all of the international, cross-cultural life transformation stories led me to look up stories about Mali.   Mali has been in the news lately (well, just public radio here, but globally in the news). Praying for peace, rather than more violence, to restore the people of Mali. All the people of Mali.

This is the season of transformation. Bulbs turn into beautiful flowers and delicious desserts. Trafficked children end up farming alongside their real families. All people in the Sahel can live in peace, unafraid of food insecurity or violence. This very hope exists because Jesus conquered death.

Even more than Spring, I love resurrection. It's always resurrection season! The sunny days are a little bonus of glory.

:)

noonday

The weather has been crazy lately. The weather forecasters have given up on predicting precipitation and say "wintry mix" instead of snow, sleet, rain, freezing rain or hail. Tonight after church, I was driving through Bremerton to finish a few errands and prepare for the coming week.

All around Bremerton were sunbreaks. Seattle literally glowed. New snow on Green Mountain reflected sunlight. But driving through Bremerton, I had to use my headlights. A dark, heavy cloud clung to the city limits. Cresting the hill that leads to my house, I was struck to pray for my city.

Tuesday I'm hosting a party for small group. Inviting extra friends because it's my birthday. Asking friends to prayerfully consider donating to Walk In The Light International. (We're raising money to build houses for teachers, an issue that would be near to my heart even if I wasn't planning to live there soon!)

Before the party, though, I hope to invite some of my neighbors over for dinner. I've been wanting to for awhile, but too busy. And, I don't want to knock on my neighbors' doors when its dark. :( Thanks to Daylight Savings time! Now, I can invite my neighborhood into my home.

In my mind, this is all connected as the fasting that pleases God. I'd been fasting one day a week to purify and prepare my heart for the big move to Burkina. Today's sermon, though, revealed some of the selfishness in my real motives. Instead of fasting food tomorrow, I'm going to hold myself accountable to actually invite my neighbors to dinner. I'm not saying this to sound spiritual, rather for a little extra accountability so I actually do it!

It's time for me to quit being scared of the darkness and live as a child of LIGHT.

and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday. -Isaiah 58:10 NIV

twitterpated

Springtime makes my heart the good kind of anxious.

The anticipation. Excitement. Wondering if the flowers will really bloom again this year, especially after a long, cold, snowy winter.

With the promise of another hour of daylight, I extended my ritual Sunday coffee date with Jesus. After arguing through prayers at a yoga class, I pointed the Kia north and drove to a few of my favorite beaches. Spring was imminent. Snow flurries gave way to sunshine. Wind whipped the sea into choppy whitecaps. Grebes and kingfishers searched for fish. I sat in the cold sunshine, still unconvinced that God really had bigger plans than the immediate.

Now, I know intellectually that Spring is coming. The planet is still tilted, orbiting the Sun. I know that the days will get longer, the nights will get warmer, and the flowers will eventually grow and blossom. It's harder to trust that the same rhythm is true in a larger scale for my life. That was the deeper point of the argument today, I guess.

I want life to be Spring everyday! Like the scene in Bambi, where Owl explains that the woodland animals are "twitterpated." Or in Seven Brides for Seven Brothers, when the ensemble cast sings the song about Spring. I'm ready for everyone to burst into song about the pure romance of life. Is that too much to ask?

Well, at the turn-around point of my adventure, I watched the Sun dance on snowy mountaintops in front of a pasture full of migrating Trumpeter swans. The romance of life is beautiful. Still, the moment stirred something deeper in my heart. I am too easily amazed.


Later, my friend Megan clarified that I really meant I am too easily satisfied. Earth is the shadow of Heaven. Intellectually, I understand that, just like I know the tilt of the Earth causes its seasons. But my heart looks for romance in crashing waves, graceful swans, and melancholy country music. Instead, my heart was made to long for Heaven. What if the longing for Spring is merely a reflection of the deeper longing for Heaven?

Every year around this time I find peace in Chris Quialla's song Dance With Me. I know I've quoted it here before, but the lesson is just as true today. There's a lyric stolen from the Song of Songs: "See! The winter is past, the rains are over and gone. Flowers appear on the earth; the season of singing has come, the cooing of doves is heard in the land." -Song of Songs 2:11-12


Winter isn't past just yet. But Spring always comes. The rains do go away, even if we have to wait until July. The flowers appear. The singing begins. The birds often begin it.

Maybe the birds recognize the privilege of worship. Maybe they are twitterpated.

subaru people

Another gray and dreary winter day. This morning, as I was driving along the water I realized just how excited I am for Spring! It's like the air is pregnant with Spring. Any day now...

Willing Spring to come early, I wore my capri pants all day. (Coupled with a long sleeve tee and down vest, of course.) Finishing all of my plans by noon, I ventured to Mom & Dad's house with a bottle of good wine and some fancy cheese from the store.

The drizzle stopped for a moment and I convinced the family to join me on a nature walk at a nearby park. We walked down a forest trail, only to find the path to the beach was muddy and flooded. I figured we would just turn around and enjoy the walk back up to the car.

"That's okay," my Mom reported, "We're Subaru people now."

Apparently my parents have returned to their adventurous roots! Equipped with water-proof hiking shoes, we waded through squishy puddles, balanced across fallen sign posts, tiptoed over broken bridges, and even climbed past barbed wire. I love adventures with my family.

The no complaining rule helped Dad keep a positive outlook, even on the long uphill trek back to the car.

This is the day the Lord has made. Let's rejoice and be glad in it!

I'm glad He turned my family into "Subaru people." And I'm really glad that Spring will be here soon!

here

Tonight was our annual church business meeting. In the midst of preaching, praying, breaking bread, and returning praise to the King, I clearly heard one word: "HERE." But this little word requires a larger context.

1)Tonight- Grades were due today at work, but thankfully mine have been up to date all semester. My plan was to call the parents of every student earning an "F" and have a meaningful conversation about barriers to student success, strategies and supports available, and develop an action plan to get each kid back on track. I was at work calling families until well after 4 o'clock. Then, instead of spending 45 minutes at the gym, I drove to the park and took a nap in my car. That's where my heart was when I showed up at "State of the Church."
2) Was- This entire story settles into the fresh past tense, newly written.
3) Our- I'm part of the "newlife" tribe in Kitsap county (and now expanding to Pierce and Mason counties...) Tonight's gathering included many local compassion organizations that are living out the Gospel. I reconnected with friends from all walks of life, bringing the Kingdom of Heaven into our own hurting community and the larger global community. Ridiculously beautiful.
4) Annual- Newlife is 10 years old. I've been "on the mission", identifying with this part of God's family for 4 years now. I love how we celebrate what God has done in our community. And thinking about everything God has done in the last year... WOW! God is so good. He is so faithful. He is outrageous.
5) Church- It's not just about newlife, at all. The Church is Christ's Bride. Together, we carry His truth to new places. Together we speak Life and Healing. Newlife itself meets at 4 locations already, with a fifth launching this Easter and other churches in the works. My dear friend who sat next to me tonight worships God weekly at another church. Together, we serve the same Good King. I love how God brings together people from every corner of life. I love church!
6) Business- I usually have strong opinions about business (ie. money). Tonight, though, it was obvious that the business of newlife is the business of the Church. We are all called to become the Church. We've been tasked by the Savior to usher His Kingdom to Earth. We get to be part of His mission. We get to see the world healed. We get to see Kitsap transformed with the Gospel. We get to see nations healed. We get to rejoice in His victory. THAT is the business of the Church. We are called to dark places because we carry the LIGHT.
7) Meeting- The very air is electric when thousands join together in worship. There's a reason that the first disciples devoted themselves to prayer. There's a reason they broke bread together. There's a reason they shared their belongings. There's a reason they worshipped the King in everything. They knew Him. They saw Christ reflected in each other. That's why we still meet. That's how fellowship restores warriors, weary from battle. That's why meeting cannot be neglected.

That is the context of tonight's fresh history.

Towards the end of the meeting, my heart was full with rejoicing. Pastor after pastor shared heart and vision for the Church. Not just newlife, but the Church. Story after story of redemption. Conversations flooded with hope for the redemption of Kitsap, the community rooted as home. Mention after mention of West Africa, where my heart longs for.

So,

I'm standing during a worship song. Praying and singing. My heart is pulled to prepare for my trip to Burkina Faso, trusting that is where God is telling me to go. My heart longs to see work in Kitsap come to completion, for total transformation in my school. My heart is rooted in my misfit neighborhood, tucked away between the freeway and the fear of a serial killer. I cry out to God, "how can you tell me to share the Gospel in so many places?" I know that I can't be everywhere at once,

"Here."

That's where He told me to be.

"And Lo, I'm with you always, even to the end of the age." <-- It's how the Great Commission ends.

He calls me by my nickname. He says that He's there already. Wherever I am, whenever I go, He's there. Called to pray without ceasing. Constant communication with the King. Constant display of His love. Constant proclamation of His truth.

I am called to share the Gospel here.

Today, that meant at Ridgetop. Tomorrow, it may mean my neighbors. Next year, it could mean Burkina Faso. But, I am always equipped with the commission to preach the Gospel here.

faithful in the small things

I woke up at 11 am with a clear direction for the day:

Drive to the casino and pray.

Weird. Attainable. Small.

So, I did. And nothing "happened". Driving out of the casino, there was a medic and a fire truck. So I prayed more and kept driving. Without a plan for the day, I kept driving to my favorite organic bakery for my weekly coffee date with Jesus.

Sitting at the window, sipping my mocha, I read my Bible. Stories of success when kings rely on God. Stories of disaster when kings rely on themselves. That I would be faithful in the small things, always relying on God.

Talked for a moment with a new church friend finishing school in Seattle, placing my sister on my heart. I texted her and made plans for the evening.

Bought a ticket for the ferry right as it sailed away.

Just enough time to catch up with a dear friend in Montana. This week will require many phone dates, I think. Big things are happening as we rely on God.

Used the ferry ride to read a book about coaching relationships in ministry. Such good advice about hearing, understanding and challenging leaders to be so in love with Jesus. I have a lot to learn.

And a beautiful evening with my sister. Praising the God who brings us together. The God who lifts us out of the circumstances we earn, into glorious grace. I'm quite the fan of grace tonight. I hope to always rely on the God of grace. I pray for strength to be faithful in the small things.