There's a deep, unsettled feeling that surrounds me as I move through each day. Clouds of questions relentlessly pursue the spaces between my thoughts. I recognize the weight of consequence; I know the depth of doubt. I live in the reality of uncertainty.
There have been times in my life, chronicled in this same blog, where I championed an unwavering faith during similar stretches. A blind loyalty could justify the same approach now. However, there are larger differences at play in 2025. Those claiming the name of the Church are loudly choosing positions and policies that violate human rights, caring for the poor, and seeing Christ's face in each person. The dissonance between the Scriptures I have loved and the practices posed bring a new heaviness, a very darkness.
I am learning the deeper power of kindness: the very power that enabled Jesus to climb onto the cross. A reckless denial of self-preservation is at the heart of the Gospel. Jesus espoused, then embodied the willingness to lay down one's life for a neighbor. From the origin of Abraham's line, there has been space for the alien and the sojourner. Today, more than ever, I claim and cling to citizenship in Heaven, recognizing that America will align with the Beast before she aligns with the Lamb. My soul weeps and mourns for those I love who are choosing to listen to lies.
As this darkness obscures the vision of the Church, I find strength in a passage so familiar that her influence extends into the culture:
8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9 For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10 but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 11 When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 12 For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
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